A sister shares her brother’s struggle with addiction and homelessness to inspire empathy for those facing isolation and rejection.
By Julie Showers
Mandy Brumbach’s older brother, Joe, battled addiction and homelessness for many years, a struggle that tragically culminated in his death at the age of 41. She graciously shared his story to remind us that behind every person we see on the street gripped by addiction, there are often family and friends who are forever grieving their slow painful descent into isolation.
A young Joe Brumbach proudly holds a fish he caught.
Growing up in Twin Falls, Idaho, Mandy and Joe were close despite hardships. Their father suffered from severe mental illness creating a difficult home environment and difficult relational trauma. But for Joe, life was made harder by the rejection he experienced after coming out as gay at 18, something he’d known since childhood. Raised in a conservative Catholic community, he felt alienated and unsupported, which marked the beginning of his emotional and mental health struggles. Seeking a place where he belonged, Joe moved frequently—from Idaho to Portland to California and even Las Vegas—but the community support he desperately needed remained elusive.
“The way I see it is it was a downhill spiral when he came out as gay in Idaho. That rejection severed his sense of self,” Mandy recalls. “He couldn’t find the community he desired in our town so he moved, searching for where he belonged. As he started meeting new people, he also started trying drugs.”
His vulnerability and naivety left him susceptible to exploitation.
“What he wanted more than anything was to find somebody to love. He wanted to be held. He told me once, ‘Nobody has held me in years,’” Mandy said.
Mandy recalls Joe as a kind and creative soul who loved animals, dreamed of becoming a movie director, and shared a close bond with his sister.
“He was the most tender loving, caring, teachers’ favorite, a good student, a good person, and was passionate about film his whole life. We were super close. Our parents divorced when we were young. I saw our lives as him being dealt a harder hand of cards,” Mandy said.
Joe Brumbach (left) with sister Mandy in front of the family Christmas tree.
The Harsh Reality of Homelessness
Life on the streets was brutal for Joe, his mental health deteriorated, and he experienced many arrests and hospital stays. There were moments of hope, such as a year-long inpatient treatment program and group home stays, but stability was fleeting. The trauma of homelessness left him in a constant state of fear and paranoia, often leading to combative behavior. This protective defense mechanism Mandy believes masked the pain of a deeply wounded individual.
“Inside, these are wounded people who want safety and security but that’s hard to see while they are living in these big adult bodies,” Mandy shared. “One small act of kindness toward this community can go a long way. Treating them with respect and dignity can go a long way. Smiling or responding when they are asking for something. Waving or giving them space when it seems like they need it.”
Despite his struggles, Joe retained his hopeful and caring nature. Mandy recalls how he would still call her from the streets to ensure she was okay.
The Importance of Compassion and Community Support
Mandy believes that help and healing start with understanding and compassion. She urges people to look beyond the surface behavior of those struggling with addiction and homelessness.
“These are not bad people. They are people who have lived through bad circumstances,” she emphasized.
Joe’s journey inspired Mandy to become a counselor and educator. She joined an organization, Shazaam PDX, whose goal is to empower children and adolescents and create safe spaces for all children, including those exploring their identities which she hopes will keep others from facing the kind of isolation her brother endured.
Joe Braumbach (left), cousin Jillian (center), and Mandy (right) enjoyed a day downtown Portland, OR.
His Memory is a Blessing to Others
Mandy and her family have taken steps to support those in need in honor of Joe. They established a memorial fund that has led to the implementation of an LGBTQ+ youth program with Southern Idaho Pride. The family also generously supports Blanchet House’s services to help others in similar circumstances.
“We’ve always wanted to help people like my brother,” Mandy says.
In an odd twist of fate, Mandy found herself at Blanchet House’s Pride event in 2024, which involved attendees helping to set a new meatball eating record.
“Meatballs remind me of my brother. Growing up we loved Jim Carry’s humor in the movie The Mask when he would say, “That’s a spicy meatball!’ We would say that to each other all the time,” Mandy fondly recalls. “So, meatballs and pride? What a great way to honor my brother.”
Through Blanchet House and her ongoing efforts, Mandy ensures that Joe’s life inspires change, fosters understanding, and, most importantly, spreads the message that kindness and respect can transform lives.
